RHS Garden Wisley

The past few weeks have been utterly crazy and I mean it quite literally. Promotion in my day job has steered me away from everything else and I've been preparing for the new academic year, trying to sort out the system to liberate some precious time (for me and everyone else).

Writing? Not much, to be honest but I knew this would be the case and taking a break doesn't hurt either. Starting with a series of short stories in mid October and investing heavily in the promotion of my first novel (I feel guilty as I haven't done much but time will come).

In the mean time, I've spent some quality time with my family. Well, I am a family man after all, although my availability in September departed heavily from the commonly accepted definition of "family". Ah, well, that's life. So, what were we up to then? RHS (Royal Horticultural Society) Garden Wisley is the answer and looking at the images, I don't think you need words for this.

Long time

I haven't posted anything for so long Firefox actually wanted me to retype the already saved password... Shame on me! Ah well, life was tough in the past few weeks and tiredness caught up with me big time. I'm swinging from exhilarated anticipation of something wonderful to dark depths of self-doubt but I'm not giving up (apart from an occasional rant on my blog - purely for cleansing purposes though...).

The Construction Management Strategies book is coming out on 30 March 2012 and my novel is coming out by the end of March too so I should be happy, right? Wrong! I spent weeks now doubting myself, doubting my writing and desperately scanning through the books in Waterstone's whilst on a business trip in Edinburgh (ssshhh!), trying to compare my writing with published and respected authors.

Good grief, why does life play around with our emotions so much? I read an article today saying we should let go and give our emotions space to breathe. I'm doing it, don't you worry about that but doubt always finds a way back (if only I'd have such a good Sat-Nav!). I let go, it feels fabulous for a while but then it comes back again and so on and so forth. Doubt, get out of my life!

My hope and my wish? All of this will go away once my books are published. In the mean time, I sit and wait for my copy-editors to do their job dying in doubt and praying my copy-editors don't come back saying it was all in vain. I love the story, I think it flows nicely but doubt is eating me alive right now. Aaghhhrrr

Good feeling

I cannot believe it! I finished my first edit of the novel and my professional book is finished as well. Two books at the same time is no mean feat (no sabbatical my friends!). I am openly proud of this. The past few days more resembled a drama, a crime story even. My day job is getting increasingly more frustrating as some gnarling worshipers of power are getting increasingly more arrogant - long live the dictatorship! No whining though, it's a great motivating force, that is.

In the mean time I've been rewriting the finishing lines of the novel. I just couldn't identify with the previous version. It was too negative, perhaps morbid (god forbid). It needed further tweaks to make it lighter yet even more complicated beefing up the manuscript to 82,148 words (currently - will change in due course). I looked at the opening page again and the more I look at the book, the more my eyes sail through the pages, the more I like it. Editing is tough but the story is interesting making the work, believe it or not, really enjoyable.

Despite all the downs and rarely any ups I feel good, I am filled with a good feel energy. Please, please last the good feeling, please do and I will reward you with even more of the wonderful writing and my good deeds. Yes, I am praying, feeling good is so much better than feeling miserable.

Hey, it's only 1am and I can actually go to bed earlier tonight. I'm telling you, it's all good.

Devotion & Deception

It's 3am and I need to get some sleep but I've got to give you a bit of an update. The first round of self-editing will be finished by Friday so I'm positive I can finish the job by mid January.

I've spoken to copy editors and they promised to get their important bit of the job done within 2 weeks. That means I will publish my first novel by  mid February (yippee)! You have no idea how much I look forward to this day. I know there is a lot of hard work ahead but I don't give a damn, I want this book published, period.

On this note, have I revealed the title yet? Ah, wait, I have actually (here).

Anyway, I finished two cover designs today and I'm pleased with the results. It's interesting how some random assignments using graphics software make sense now... I used preview images from iStockPhoto to create samples so bear with me, the cover designs will be released as soon as I purchase the images.

Oh, and by the way, I watched a movie about J. K. Rowling today. What a story, what a woman! Joanne, you're one of my heroes!

2012 - My year

Yeah, 2012 is the year I break through and make it big time! My first novel and my first textbook are both a huge success and I finally manage to set free to a great career as a writer. I start selling the first in a series of my innovative products and we move into a new house.

This is a fabulous year and we should all make the most of it. Any hidden desires? Have you tried to write a book for years but never got enough time to do so? That's the year you should be doing this! Put dilemmas aside, just do it, go for it, "what the heck" it and leap into the embrace of these desires, make them a reality, let them come true and make you and everyone around yourself happy. Come on, you know you deserve it!

Happy new year to the world, let it be a mind-blowing success, let it shine!

Anxiety kicks in

Here we go, the official period for editing and reviewing has begun and as soon as I finished the 80,000 word book demons of doubt have awaken from their long sleep (yeah, I think it was a pretty long sleep). Looking back at the text I immediately spotted mistakes, particularly in the final stage that is supposed to set the tone for its sequel. I'm not sure whether this is normal or not but I feel numb after spending more than two months writing almost every night and not going to bed before 3am, only to face the grueling schedule of lectures and my academic engagement afterwards (i.e. a glamorous life of the author in the making I guess...).

I loved writing my first novel and I think the story is gripping, with lots of utterly unexpected twists and turns but   the demons keep telling me all sorts of things that will need to be corrected. Again, is that normal? Does that happen to all writers? I'm not sure but whatever the case I shall leave it for a week now and then commence the editing. It will take a few rounds of editing before I can send it off to a copy editor, and I will also give the book to a few people to read but I'm doing it for the first time and I totally dread the prospect of severe criticism, no matter how valuable it is. I am not going to pretend, a man takes some time to get used to criticism and I'm not sure how much time I will need (go away ego...).

On a more positive side, have you ever noticed how listening a fabulous song over and over again takes away its shimmer? Why is that, I wonder? You first can't stop listening but after a while your mind and soul stop reacting. Is that the consequence of consumerism - i.e. we need a constant influx of new ever more exciting stimuli? Perhaps it's our human nature that is flourishing in consumerism though I don't feel ashamed - I got bored of one particular song recently (though I'm not going to tell you which one... cheeky!).

Self-editing

Just having a sneak preview of the Self-Editing for Fiction Writers and the first few pages already scared the hell out of me! Why? Well, I am currently going through the copy-editing process for my new professional book that is coming out in April 2012 (yeah, don't ask, it's a nightmare being involved with two different books let alone two genres).

The key finding of that process is that copy editors aren't doing their job very well and this book actually tells you why this is so. They are overburdened with work and the process is far from meticulous. I don't blame them as I am in a situation like this myself - desperately trying to keep myself afloat and DO things PROPERLY! It is really tough and that is why the above book is so scary - it basically says fiction writers should self-edit up to the hilt before sending anything to copy editors. No wonder why I keep being awake till the early morning hours almost every single day.

No choice, I'll do it several times and the book needs proofreading anyway so there is no excuse really. I love writing and if that involves mastering self-editing then so be it, I'll do it.

Ups and downs II.

I should have finished my book by now... Yeah, right, as if things are ever so easy. I studied chaos theory and should know by now long- or even medium-term plans never work out. Actually, I do know this and that's why I am not depressed too much. Hell no, I'm lying to myself! I am depressed but I know I can't turn back time.

My day job managed to turn the past week into a running-around-like-a-headless-chicken kind of time leaving me very little energy to write the remaining few thousand words (even my delicious gluten-free diet couldn't help this time round).

Yeah, I am really close and I can see the whole story nicely folding up within the next 5,000 words. This should be a matter of a week,... yeah, we'll see but whatever the case, I am heading in the right direction and I love how the book is evolving into a piece of work that begs for continuation.

In the mean time, I've got to finish reading a thesis, preparing a presentation for next week's Oil & Gas conference (don't ask...) and most definitely completing the review of a journal paper as the deadline is on Friday!